For me there are moments in parenting when I realized things with both Charlie and Brdley had shifted, but you can’t pinpoint the exact day it happened. Which happened with Suzzane as well before she was called home. I just wish I could have seen the women she would have become although I’m enjoying watching Charlie become a man.
I have a question for you how did you notice how your child started showing up in the world. What stopped you in your tracks and why? For me personally it was seeing how bad Charlie was hurting yet he didn’t give up and went on to work. That’s been happening with Charlie and Bradley a lot lately.
They’ve been working long hours—real long hours. The kind that stretch from the afternoon into late night, and sometimes into the early morning hours. And even when they come home exhausted, they still get up and goes back to work just like his dad and grandfather would do.
What stands out to me most isn’t just how hard the boys have been working. It’s how much they’re starting to take responsibility for themselves. For me this is a Godsend because now I don’t worry about them being able to take care of themselves if something happened to David and I.
Little things are changing. The way the boys think about money. The way Charlie tries not to ask for help the way he used to. The way they look for ways to handle things on there own first before coming to us. Even something as simple as gas money—Charlie doesn’t want to keep relying on us for it. He’s trying to figure things out, piece by piece, in his own way.
And as a mom, you notice that kind of shift. Because you remember when they were little and everything came from you. Every need. Every fix. Every answer. And now you’re watching them slowly take those things into their own hands.
It doesn’t happen all at once. It happens in small moments. Long work shifts. Tired feet. Quiet decisions made without anyone watching. And late-night conversations where you realize they’re not the same child they were just a few months ago.
I won’t pretend it’s always easy to watch them grow up and not need me as much. There’s pride in it, yes—but there’s also that emotional pull of missing the younger version of the boys while still being amazed at the person they’re becoming.
Charlie is still Charlie. Bradley is still Bradley That hasn’t changed. But the way there stepping into responsibility—that’s something new. And I think that’s what growing up really is. Not one big moment. But a collection of small ones that slowly shape who they are becoming.
As a mom, I’m learning something too. I’m learning to step back a little. Just as David is. To let them make decisions. To let them figure things out. And to trust that everything we’ve tried to teach them over the years is finally starting to show up in real life.
So I watch the boys go to work. I watch the boys come home tired just like there dad. I watch the boys try to fix things on there own instead of avoiding problems and letting us handle it for them. And I realize this is what growing up looks like from the other side.
Quiet. Messy. Proud. And a little emotional. But beautiful all the same. As I thank the LORD for both Charlie and Bradley and helping me keep the circle unbroken as David and I work hard to keep this Circus running and the kids in line.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
