This week has been bitter sweet as we get ready to lay David’s dad to rest. But there are moments in life that remind you just how many people have quietly been cheering you on all along. For our family, that moment was Charlie’s graduation at 16 1/2 from Homeschool.
Granny and I had worked so hard through the years to make sure he reached that day. Whether he had graduated from public school or homeschooled, the goal was always the same—to see him walk across that stage and receive his diploma. Thank the LORD he did.
When it came time to order his graduation gown, I told Charlie he could choose any color he wanted. The sky was the limit. Without hesitation, he picked black and pink. Some people looked at it a little funny. Did I care? Not one bit. Because Charlie has always had a mind of his own and this just proved it.
It was his graduation, his accomplishment, and I couldn’t have been prouder. When I told Granny the colors he had chosen, she simply smiled and said, “If that’s what he wants, then that’s what he’s going to get.” That was Granny. She believed in letting Charlie be himself, and she always stood behind him.
She also wanted his graduation to be remembered forever, so she reached out to Uncle Don. Don had spent years as a professional artist and photographer, working on projects for Walt Disney and illustrating Louis L’Amour books. She wanted someone she trusted to capture one of the biggest days of Charlie’s life.
The photographs he took became treasures. One of my favorite memories from that day happened during the pictures. I honestly expected David Sr.—Charlie’s Grandpa Pa—to have something to say about that pink graduation gown. Instead, he showed up wearing his familiar overalls and his veteran’s hat.
Without a second thought, he walked right over and proudly stood beside his grandson for their picture together. There wasn’t a hint of embarrassment. There wasn’t a joke about the color. There was only pride and love beaming from Charlie as he stood next to his grandfather.
Granny managed to sneak herself into one of the pictures too, and I’m so thankful she did. Then Uncle Don realized David and I hadn’t taken any family pictures with Charlie at all. His feelings were a little hurt that we’d forgotten. So before the day was over, he made sure we went back and took more photographs together. Looking back now, I’m grateful he insisted.
If I have one regret, it’s that we didn’t gather everyone together for one big family picture. At the time, you never think about how precious those moments will become. You simply believe there will always be another holiday, another birthday, another chance. Life doesn’t always work that way. Since then, Pa has passed away.
Every time I look at those graduation pictures, I’m reminded how thankful I am that Uncle Don captured those moments. When we got home after graduation, that special picture of Charlie with his grandparents was hung on Granny’s wall. It hung directly across from Grandpa Pa’s chair.
It was right beside the bed he slept in when he stayed in the living room. Every single day, he could look up and see his grandson in that pink graduation gown. That picture is still hanging there today. It’s more than a photograph now. It’s part of our family’s story.
Charlie still talks about that day. He remembers how proud Granny and Grandpa Pa were. He remembers how Granny helped me search for decorations and stretch every dollar so we could celebrate without going over our budget. He remembers how every school year Grandpa Pa would ask, “Is there anything you need for school? Anything you want?”
Those weren’t just questions. They were his way of saying, “I’m here for you.” The pink graduation gown is still hanging in my closet today. His cap is right there with it. The photographs hang in our home where I see them often. Every single time I walk past them, I smile.
Not because of the gown. Not because graduation is over. I smile because I can still see the love in Pa’s eyes as he stood beside Charlie. That photograph reminds me that love doesn’t have to be spoken. Sometimes love simply shows up. Sometimes it stands beside you for a picture.
Sometimes it quietly tells the world, “That’s my grandson, and I’m proud of him.” My only sadness is that my own mom and dad weren’t here to see Charlie graduate. I’ve often wondered what my dad would have thought about that pink graduation gown. Honestly, I have no idea.
Now my mom? She would have stood beside Charlie no matter what he wore. Well…maybe not if he’d shown up wearing nothing at all! She definitely would have had something to say about that, and we’d probably still be laughing about it today. Again I am reminded to take photos because I have none of my parents either alone or with Charlie.
That little joke about my mom and Charlie always makes me smile because that’s what family memories do. They make us laugh, they make us cry, and years later they remind us just how deeply we were loved. The moments we show up for become the moments we remember forever.
Have you ever looked at an old family photograph and realized it had become more valuable with every passing year? I’d love to hear about the picture that means the most to you.
Grateful. Thankful. Blessed.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
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