If you’ve been around me and my family long either in person or here reading the post I share with you then you know I’m not a patient person and neither is Charlie while David can waste more time than 10 people put together doing one task.
I wanted to share another post with you for The Day God Showed Me Ten Lessons Instead of One: Reflections from My Front Porch: Waiting Isn’t Wasted Time which if you were to know me very well you would know I might disagree with that statement but that day I found out waiting wasn’t wasted time it was the LORDs plans for my family.
The other day I was working in my office when Charlie finally climbed out of bed about 10:30, even though he had to be at work at 3. He already knew he had to go get the oil changed on the car and pick up an oil filter. I didn’t realize he was going to want me to go with him.
The next thing I know, he’s standing in my office asking, “Are you ready? Are you ready? Let’s go.” And I’m still basically in what I slept in the night before. Being a mom and wanting to keep the peace I decided to pick my battles and stop what I was doing,even though I was working which no, one seems to get.
I jumped up, and went to look for clothes so I could get dressed, and be out the door in about five minutes because he’s standing there rushing me, hollering, “Hurry, hurry, hurry.” And I remember thinking in that moment… there was no warning. No time to finish what I was doing. No “hey Mom, can you be ready in a little bit.” Just instant urgency.
We got in the car and the whole tone of the day felt like that — rushed. Everything was hurry, hurry, hurry. We had errands to run, places to go, and things that had to be handled, but nothing felt steady. It felt like we were constantly trying to catch up to the day instead of moving through it.
And what made it harder was the way the pressure kept building. Little things turned into big frustrations. Conversations got shorter. Tension started showing up where there didn’t need to be any. As much as I hate to admit it a lot of it was because Bradley was with us. He kept making us wait but instead of fussing at Bradley like Charlie was doing to me he gave Bradley space.
By the time we were done running around, I was already drained. Not just physically, but mentally worn out from the pace of everything. When I finally walked back into the house, I saw the sink full of dishes, things still waiting to be done, and David already exhausted from everything he had been doing all day too.
It felt like everyone in the house was running on empty in different ways. There were moments during the day where I started noticing something deeper, though. It wasn’t just about being rushed. It was about how differently patience shows up depending on the situation and the person involved.
There were moments where grace was given easily in one direction, but not the same in another. Moments where frustration was acceptable in one situation, but not tolerated in another. And that imbalance is something that sits heavy on you when you’re the one trying to hold everything together.
At one point, I had to just step back in my mind and ask myself what God was trying to show me in all of this. And what kept coming back to me was simple — but not easy. Waiting isn’t wasted time. But waiting also doesn’t mean I have to lose my peace in the process.
It doesn’t mean I have to accept being rushed without communication. It doesn’t mean I have to carry everyone else’s urgency at the expense of my own calm. Motherhood teaches you love in a way nothing else does, but it also teaches you where your limits are if you’re willing to see them.
And I’m learning that those limits are not something to feel guilty about — they are something to pay attention to. Because I am human too. I need time to breathe too. And I need communication just as much as anyone else does. I also need patience and grace when I’m working not attitude because I can’t stop what I’m doing because you want something.
By the end of the day, I wasn’t just thinking about how chaotic everything felt. I was thinking about what needs to change going forward. How I respond differently. How I slow myself down even when everyone else is speeding up. And how I stop allowing the rush of other people to erase my own space.
Because what God showed me through all of this wasn’t just one lesson. It was ten little lessons wrapped into one long, exhausting, eye-opening day. And the biggest one of all is this: Waiting isn’t wasted time — but peace matters too.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
